Wednesday Night I Took Down The 9-9-9 Challenge at Gauranteed Rate Field

A few housekeeping notes:

– Lotta people saying “pray for WSD’s toilet”.  It’s actually quite the opposite.  I haven’t made a bowel movement since Thursday now.  It’s basically like trying to digest a leather belt I guess. Kinda concerning

– Lotta people also calling me epithets like “bitch” and “pussy” for how fast I was chugging.  If you’re one of those people, you obviously don’t listen to Red Line Radio, because we’ve gone over this before.  I’m a grade 40 chugger.  A replacement level chugger.  I make up for it with a grade 80 bladder (didn’t piss the entire game, woulda thrown me off my rhythm), and grade 70 stamina (thank you Hangge Uppe!).  I’m basically the Mark Buehrle of beer drinking.  Not a big fastball but will give you 7 quality innings every binge drinking session

– 9th inning guy was seriously the stuffiest guy ever to step foot into Comiskey Park.  He’s been banned from the White Sox bandwagon, heretofore:

– Shout out Jason Benetti and Steve Stone for mentioning the greatest shirt ever slung on the internet

– Portnoy loves acting like he doesn’t know his lesser minions more than you love your own mother

– Big shout out to our camera guy Brian for cutting up the video after Carl and I sent him about 60 iPhone videos for him to piece together like a goddamn puzzle piece

– a TON more video content like this coming up with me, Carl, Eddie and Chief