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April 22, 2008

Random Thoughts


Barstool Local Smokeshow of the Day (Stacey)

Introducing Stacey from Abington and apparent BU student.  Now I know what you’re thinking because I’m thinking it too.  This girl is so hot that she has to be fake right? I mean how can this girl exist in Abington and I don’t know about her.   The only thing this reminds me of is when Hammerhead Hagon was training underneath Honey Roy Palmer’s Gym in Diggstown and he had no clue what was going on.    Bottom-line is that if this girl exists we will have her on a cover within 2 months.  If she’s fake than I need to start being more suspicious of smokeshow nominations.

Do you know any real smokeshows?   Please send them our way at randomthoughts@barstoolsports.com

 

s

 

Click to see more pics of Stacey

— elpresidente, 5:48 pm | permalink | 90 comments


Was the Bruins Season "Magnificent"?

 

MONTREAL - The conclusion kind of stunk, but that doesn’t diminish in the slightest the magnificent season the overachieving Bruins [team stats] produced - a year few NHL observers believed possible. -The Herald

MONTREAL - As the 2007-08 Bruins filed out of the visitors' dressing room at the Bell Centre for one final time last night...[their] captivating, hard-hitting, longer-than-expected season had come to an end. To a man, they noted how proud they were of each other. -The Globe

I really hate to be the one to turn on the lights and ruin the circle jerk here, but isn't this celebration of the Bruins' almost successful, practically inspirational, non-victory a little excessive? When do they fire up the duck boats? Aren't we the City of Champions? Since when do we champion mediocrity? When did we start using words like "magnificent" to describe a season where you squeak into the 16th playoff spot then go one-and-done?

I'm not a hockey hater. There was a time when the Bruins were the most important thing in my life. Nor am I saying I've sworn them off for good like in "Rudy" when Pete says "Frank, you used to like Notre Dame" and Frank says "Yeah, I used to collect baseball cards too." I want the B's to be good again. But not so badly that I'm ready to take an almost comeback in an opening round defeat and compare them to Rocky Balboa like the Globe did today. I'm not trying to be a dick by saying a team has to win a title or the season is a failure, but pardon me if I'm not running out to buy a "Took the Canadiens to a 7th Game" t-shirt either.

 

Vote 1 for the season sucked and 10 for it was magnificent

 

— Jerry Thornton, 5:07 pm | permalink | 64 comments


Boston College DE Brady Smith in court, charged with rape

Brady Smith

 

Bostonherald.com - A star Boston College defensive end was charged with on-campus sexual assault and breaking and entering early yesterday morning. Brady Smith, 20, of Finksburg, Md., is a junior at the college and started 12 games last year during the team’s 11-3 season.

Just another day at the Heights.  If the Superfans aren’t beating people up at The Greatest Bar then they are getting charged with breaking and entering and sexually assaulting people.  It's so sad.   For all this talk about academic requirements maybe they should start concentrating more on the moral requirements needed to get in to BC.    Yeah I know they have a 37 game Cheerio Bowl winning streak to protect, but isn’t the safety of the community just a little bit more important than recruiting these thugs so they can win meaningless Bowl games?    

— elpresidente, 4:30 pm | permalink | 70 comments


Breaking News! NESN Hires Heidi Watney (Total Smokeshow) To Replace Tina Cervasio

 

h

 

Bostonherald.com - NESN has hired Fresno, Calif., native Heidi Watney to replace Tina Cervasio.

 

About freaking time that NESN did something right. This chick is HOT. She may even light a fire under Ken Macha's ass. Who knows? I'll still miss Tina Cervasio, but these two broads are in totally different leagues in terms of looks. I can't wait to watch her get soaked in all the post season celebrations. Papelbon must be freaking psyched. This is a significant upgrade for him over Tina who he was obviously nailing. It'll be interesting to see how long it takes him to conquer Heidi Watney. Although she kind of looked like a tough cookie in that Steve Kline interview. But Paps has got way more game than that. Should be interesting to watch that dynamic develop.

— elpresidente, 3:57 pm | permalink | 34 comments


Randi Goldklank Hair Style Showdown....Butch Vs. Long....Who Ya Got?

go

(Globe Photo)

Vs.

her

(Herald Photo)

 

The Herald posted some different pictures of Boston's newest sensation Randi Goldklank. (AKA - The GM of WHDH who freaked out at Logan Airport last night and then tried to suck some State Trooper dick to get out of it) Anyway I think it's fair to say that the reason she was in such a foul mood was because of her hair cut. What is going on in that first picture? I'd be drinking myself silly too if that was me.

PS - You got to love this quote from an article last year on Goldklank when she first got the job.

"She is extremely aggressive but in a positive and professional way," says Carson, now a consultant for WHDH. "She believes in working hard, but she also believes in having fun along the way."

I'll say she believes in having fun along the way. Anyway time to vote. Do you like Goldklank with the long hair or the short hair? Vote 1 for long and 10 for short

— elpresidente, 3:23 pm | permalink | 31 comments


Is Leonardo DiCarprio Drunk Dialing Gisele?

b

b

(Consider Leonardo DiCarprio's girlfriend Bar Rafaeli as good as prego if he even thinks about drunk dialing Gisele)

 

National Ledger.com - Is it time for New England Patriots quarterback Tom Brady to start worrying about something other than blitzing linebackers?  Is Leonardo DiCaprio getting ready to put a speed rush on Brady gal Gisele Bundchen? A report from Star magazine notes that even though Leonardo DiCaprio is hot and heavy with Israeli model Bar Refaeli, he still carries a torch for ex-girlfriend Gisele Bundchen, a report published in this week's magazine claims. According to a source cited by Star, the 33-year-old calls Gisele, 27, after he's had few too many drinks.  Is Leo really drunk dialing Gisele?  That what the claim is from the source. 

Is this article really asking whether Tom Brady is worried about Leonardo DiCarprio stealing back Gisele?    Ha! Ha! Ha!   Listen dude, actors don’t steal girlfriends from NFL QB’s unless we’re talking about one of the Manning brothers who are so ugly they make girls fake gay.  So I don’t believe this story for a second.   I mean if you were Leonardo DiCarprio would you drunk dial Gisele?   The only think that is going to accomplish is to piss off Tom Brady.   And then next thing you know he’s going to be balls deep in Bar Rafaeli writing his initial on her tits with his jizz.    Everybody knows this.  Even little Leonardo DiCaprio.   This is why I hate gossip magazines. They just make shit up out of the blue.

 

On a totally different note have people noticed how frequently we've been updating the blog lately? If there was a blogging Purple Heart the Stool would totally get it.

 

- NFL Juice

 

 

— elpresidente, 2:49 pm | permalink | 27 comments


Guess That Ass

— elpresidente, 2:15 pm | permalink | 22 comments


Channel 7 GM Freaks Out At Logan Airport

go

 

Boston.com - The general manager of WHDH Channel 7 was arrested after an allegedly drunken, obscenity-laced tirade at Logan International Airport in which she threatened to call a news crew and put a State Trooper "on TV and ruin [his] life," according to a police report.  Randi Goldklank flailed her arms and screamed at State Police when they took her into custody after her Delta flight landed Sunday night, according to the report. "I'm a bigshot in Boston and I'll have you're [expletive] jobs," Goldklank told the troopers, according to the report. "You think you're a [expletive] tough guy, just you watch and see what the [expletive] happens to you when I get out of here." Goldklank defended her behavior to the Boston Herald Monday night and told the paper she was inappropriately touched by a male passenger seated beside her. There was no mention of the male passenger in the State Police report. Trooper Eric Benson, a department spokesman, said this morning that “there has been no complaint made to the State Police alleging any such improper contact.” According to the report, she was overheard by police telling medical personnel that she had had "about three dozen drinks." Goldklank smelled of alcohol and was so intoxicated that police had difficulty booking her, the report stated. But then Goldklank's tone shifted.  "The defendants demeanor changed and she became quiet," the report says. "After a few minutes she leaned toward Sergeant Luce and stated, 'You think I’m cute and I think you're cute, just drive me home.' "

You got to love alpha females.  They are such a riot.   But I’m not going to sit here and throw stones at glass houses.  What big shot in Boston hasn’t been in this situation?   I know that whenever I’m in trouble with the law I always threaten to ruin people’s lives by lighting them up on the blog.    But what I’ve learned over time is that this type of behavior usually just gets the Astrovan towed, my license suspended and angry dads in my driveway.    Anyway, speaking of my license being suspended I’m totally going to steal this chick’s line once I can’t drive anymore.

“You think I’m cute and I think you’re cute, just drive me home”

It’s perfect!   What chick will be able to resist that? Granted I’m not cute ,but neither is this broad so it may work.

PS – Does being the GM at Channel 7 make you a big shot in Boston?  Vote 1 for no and 10 for yes?

— elpresidente, 1:31 pm | permalink | 60 comments

I'd hit it. Twice if she could hook me up with Frances Rivera or Christa Delcamp.

DW, Apr 22 2008, 1:35 pm

She's one angry looking broad.

Is she a carpet eater? She doesn't seem like the type to want a cream filled canonli.

She's got a face for bukkake

mike100915, Apr 22 2008, 1:37 pm

Three dozen drinks? Shouldn't she be dead? Maybe after every drink when she looks in the mirror she looks more like a female.

TylerShane, Apr 22 2008, 1:40 pm

Is Goldklank the female version of Goldmember? Who would hit that she looks like a younger version of Bob Lobel.....

H8, Apr 22 2008, 1:40 pm

She could put you on the wrong end of a grudge fuck!


true story

lugnutz, Apr 22 2008, 1:40 pm

Come on guys you wouldn't hit that????

I'd even do it a few times if she is frisky in bed

MVKID, Apr 22 2008, 1:43 pm

Everyone knows you start to lose count after your first dozen.

phd_thc, Apr 22 2008, 1:45 pm

I just hope this chick doesn't appear on my flight to Vegas this afternoon.

That's right. Vegas baby.

PCRookie, Apr 22 2008, 1:45 pm

Hey do you guys go on other messageboards to post to other guys about how much sex you have, would like to have, or could have, or is it just this one? Go to any cool circle-jerks lately?

H8, stay classy w/ the Jew comment.

PatriotsNation, Apr 22 2008, 1:46 pm

Hey patriotsnation, thanks for coming. the guy fucking guy gangbang starts in 3 minutes.

Dr. Van Nostrand, Apr 22 2008, 1:47 pm

laughing my ass off.

kager, Apr 22 2008, 1:49 pm

I'm a big fan of Anne Allnose, I mean Allred.

CptKangarooBalls, Apr 22 2008, 1:51 pm

Dr V got me laughing.

Her new title: Former General manager

UserError, Apr 22 2008, 1:53 pm

So wait, which ones the douchebag? PatriotSnation or just patrioTnaton? Wait, nevermind.....

NTown23, Apr 22 2008, 1:53 pm

dammit. 5 minutes late for guy on guy sex. story of my life.

i'd hit it twice. you know she'd be wild in the sack.

twistedtavarez, Apr 22 2008, 1:54 pm

Nothing against Hebrew Nation...

True Story

H8, Apr 22 2008, 1:54 pm

Hey don't let me interrupt you guys telling eachother hypothetical stories of what you'd all do to women.

If it excites you guys that much, go crazy.

PatriotsNation, Apr 22 2008, 1:55 pm

everyone knows Don Jeans is the only big shot in boston.

Raw Dog, Apr 22 2008, 1:56 pm

she's got a twig and berries between her legs for sure

johnb1222, Apr 22 2008, 2:01 pm

Of course she's wild in the sack. Ugly women with drinking problems are 99% more prone to do anything the guy wants. It's science.

TylerShane, Apr 22 2008, 2:04 pm

Wait, the photo of her on the front of the Herald looks way different, well still lesbiatic.

UserError, Apr 22 2008, 2:07 pm

is this the same chick on the front of the bostonherald.com right now? i think it is,but not sure

Billy Ray Valentine, Apr 22 2008, 2:08 pm

Of course Goldklank had three dozen drinks. I hear that's about what it takes to make one forget the taste of Passover food.

Eagle 1, Apr 22 2008, 2:08 pm

She definately eats at the Y.
Any broad with that hairdo and that much anger at men is obviously a carpet muncher.
And not a good one either, like your Wife says hey I brought Jenny from work home and had too much wine and we were wondering....etc.
The bad kind.
The mean, angry men are the root of all problems in the world let's go watch the LPGA kind...

TheViking, Apr 22 2008, 2:09 pm

What lady in the Stool administration removes post? Why?

H8, Apr 22 2008, 2:13 pm

An “Alcohol Influence Report” filled out by state police during Goldklank’s booking indicates that she was “cocky, combative, argumentative, staggering, thick tongued, unsteady and extreme,” according to court papers in East Boston District Court.

Thick Tongued. See its even in the police report, definitely dines at the Y.

itsMurda, Apr 22 2008, 2:13 pm

What lady in the Stool administration removes post? Why?

— H8, Apr 22 2008, 2:13 pm

The Jewish kind.

rearadmiral, Apr 22 2008, 2:26 pm

Does she appear on any swinging websites?

DW, Apr 22 2008, 2:33 pm

Funny commentary EP.

Champs9904, Apr 22 2008, 2:36 pm

“cocky, combative, argumentative, staggering, thick tongued, unsteady and extreme,”

Damn, that is a regular Friday night out.

kager, Apr 22 2008, 2:36 pm

H8, that last one will get you banned.

rearadmiral, Apr 22 2008, 2:41 pm

Yeah you were right up to the Hitler line H8 lmao...
You can totally bag on anybody and everybody out there, except anyone relating to Boston sports or is a race creed or denomination of anyone of any importance to the Stool.

So be safe man.
Just say:
go sawks! Yanks suk! and file in line with the rest of them.

TheViking, Apr 22 2008, 2:44 pm

The makers of Lexapro (her anxiety drug) should have warned her not to mix 24 cocktails with the pills. How was she supposed to know?
She will blame them, no doubt.

Private Idaho, Apr 22 2008, 2:47 pm

Auf wiedersehen, H8. Dumb.

Eagle 1, Apr 22 2008, 2:50 pm

everything should be fair game...race, religion, whatever...if not on this site, then society is fucked.

twistedtavarez, Apr 22 2008, 2:50 pm

Wrong, tavarez. There are moral limits, and el pres needs to sell advertising space.

Eagle 1, Apr 22 2008, 2:54 pm

If she was resposible for hiring julie donaldson, I'll give her a pass.

peepoo, Apr 22 2008, 2:55 pm

Welcome to the wonderful world of Political Correctness.
Where you been twistedtavarez?


TheViking, Apr 22 2008, 2:55 pm

no, you're wrong eagle. when you start picking and choosing, it's not free speech.

you're no better than al sharpton if you think otherwise.

twistedtavarez, Apr 22 2008, 2:58 pm

Thanks for the heads up rearadmiral and viking....

It seems that these boys can't hang so they want to take their ball and go home.I didn't address anyone at the stool personally..If you can't laugh at yourself then don't peddle smut.

I lead not follow so when the hammer comes so be it.

H8, Apr 22 2008, 2:59 pm

Idaho, 3 dozen cocktails would be 36 drinks.

I think.

UserError, Apr 22 2008, 2:59 pm

Goldklank = Paula - check it out - right down to the

"I'm very discreet... but I will haunt your dreams"

LarryJoeBird, Apr 22 2008, 3:02 pm

Oh, uh, yeah 36. I was daydreaming about her thick tongue.

Private Idaho, Apr 22 2008, 3:02 pm

Eagle 1 the world is not for the meek so go hide...

H8, Apr 22 2008, 3:03 pm

Eagle 1...the stool peddles smut, makes fun of the mentally challenged,grades pedophiles and has laughed at children...and you stand on moral limits.....you are a clown. What I said about that classless goldensteinklank doesn't even compare. They want to regulate their site on their reasons I'm ok with that....If I want to play in their yard its their rules...Its AQmerica and I'm ok with it..

H8, Apr 22 2008, 3:09 pm

Sorry boys AMERICA

H8, Apr 22 2008, 3:10 pm

H8:

Thanks, Confusious. You're correct. Right now, go grab a big flag with a swastika on it and march down Beacon street. Let's see how not-meek you are. Douchebag jackass.

twisted:

This is not a goverment sponsored free-speech site. It's a privately-sponsored site devoted to sports, hot chicks, and BC-bashing whose owner is looking to make some money via advertising sales. Allowing postings by people who suggest that Hitler may have been right does not help promote that goal.

Eagle 1, Apr 22 2008, 3:22 pm

i have never seen the stool post racist blogs so i'm not really seeing the connection H8.

mark, Apr 22 2008, 3:24 pm

mark, I think H8 wants to reply as if this site falls under the Bill of Rights...it doesn't.

rearadmiral, Apr 22 2008, 3:30 pm

so free speech doesn't apply when you're on someone's private property, or on their message board? interesting. we are still in america, aren't we?

the hitler comment was a joke. if you didn't find it funny, that's your choice. frankly, H8 is rambling on now and kind of being a douche. but he's right. there are just as many disgusting things said on here about other classes of people. but when it hits close to home (reverend al) then people want to start drawing lines in the sand. it's hypocracy.

twistedtavarez, Apr 22 2008, 3:30 pm

Mark,

the connection is that moral limits is a stupid argument....

Eagle 1..I'm part jew and went to BC...so go fuck yourself. You are a moron..I'm embarrassed that my kind acts that way in such a high profile position. But your argument that its ok to bash some not all is racist. But alas, it is a private site so I will play by their rules. Maybe.

H8, Apr 22 2008, 3:34 pm

In more than one sense, it's Jackie Warner on top and Jackie's girlfriend (doesn't matter which) on the bottom.

You're Cut Too, Shushy, Apr 22 2008, 3:35 pm

i still dont see the connection.

you're telling us all to start throwing racist labels out there because its america?

obviously people can't say what they want otherwise the hotchick segment wouldnt be constantly permalinked.

mark, Apr 22 2008, 3:36 pm

"[S]o free speech doesn't apply when you're on someone's private property?" That's how it works, junior. You just gave away your age, boy. If H8 is part Jewish and went to BC, then I root for BU Hockey and Notre Dame Football. Please.

Eagle 1, Apr 22 2008, 3:43 pm

an ethnic joke so everyone can relax

Q: Why are Jewish men circumcised?
A: Because Jewish women won't touch anything unless it is 20% off.

rukiddingme08, Apr 22 2008, 3:49 pm

uh, oh...eagle 1 is going to be on your ass now. you should have gone with an asian joke. he's fine with those.

twistedtavarez, Apr 22 2008, 3:50 pm

Let's keep focus here. This is simple.

Good: Ethnic jokes, (I love Linda Lampanelli), porn, hot lesbians, videos of fat kids, videos of old people falling down, praise of BC, "BC guys are asshats," etc.

Bad: "Maybe Hitler was right."

Eagle 1, Apr 22 2008, 3:59 pm

look up hypocrite in the dictionary, and you get:
-Eagle 1, Apr 22 2008, 3:59 pm

twistedtavarez, Apr 22 2008, 4:07 pm

This is simple:

Howard Stern (jewish): Bashes everybody, Rich

Stool( jewish): Bashes almost everybody, not so rich

Eagle 1: stupid moron

H8: Brilliant like the Sun....

H8, Apr 22 2008, 4:08 pm

Twisted, I think Eagle 1 wants to be liked by the people at the stool, he can't see the incongruencies in his argument.

But to all...I will apologize for my insenstive ethnic joke....

H8, Apr 22 2008, 4:10 pm

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Tony Romo Making Out With Jessica Simpson While High On Blue Magic

jess

 

Some bloggers may make fun of this picture of Tony Romo and Jessica Simpson making out, but not me. I'd cut off my right arm to have wild blue frosting sex with her ass. In fact if Jessica Simpson told me that I had to get a tattoo of Blue Man Group on my dick to hook up with her I'd do it in a heartbeat. She's that hot.

 

l

bj

 

- Dmagazine

— elpresidente, 12:56 pm | permalink | 19 comments


Montreal Knocks Out the #8 Seed And Riots

 

I’m sure everybody is sick and tired of talking about the hockey game last night.  But in case you didn’t hear the Bruins got their ass whooped and then the entire city of Montreal went totally Northeastern and tore the city apart.    The only reason I mention this is because it reminded me of an article that Peter Gelzinis of the Boston Herald wrote after Game 4 when a Bruins fan beat the shit out of a Canadians fan after the game.Essentially Gelzinis made it seem like the actions of one asshole somehow reflected the overall attitude of Boston.    That our city was filled with thugs and punks who made a living out of beating the shit out of opposing fans.    When I first read the article I wanted to puke.  It was yellow journalism at it’s finest.   I’m not condoning the attack or what happened, but to somehow take the actions of one individual and say it represents an entire city is reprehensible.     Especially the way Gelzinis tried to portray Montreal fans as these innocent creatures from the Great White North.    Well newsflash.   Montreal fans are fucking out of control.     They just rampaged their city after a round 1 victory of the NHL playoffs.    We’ve never had a riot like that and we having been winning World Championships like they are going out of style.   So yeah, Boston has some total assholes in it.    What city doesn’t?    But when you compare us to other major cities I’d say we’re as good as it gets in terms of fan behavior.    So next time a Boston fan does something stupid how about not saying the entire city sucks based on the actions of one fool.   Is that too much to ask?

— elpresidente, 12:23 pm | permalink | 31 comments


T.O Makes A Guest Appearance In Bang Brothers Video

t

 

d

(I shrunk the above picture down so we wouldn't see dick)

 

Man T.O is everywhere. One second he's crying on National television. The next second he is at the US Open and then two seconds later he is stumbling onto the set of a Bang Brothers video. (OBVIOUSLY NSFW) What can't this guy do? I love the smile he has going here too. Do you think he knew what was going on when he walked up to this car or he just thought he had a chance of getting laid? Regardless it's pretty funny. I just hope he doesn't show up on Red Tube or In The VIP because I don't want to see him naked. I need to keep a separation between church and state. I don't want to know any of the dudes that star in my pornos.

PS - This picture just proves how self absorbed porn stars are. Hey slut that's Terrell Owens walking down the street. Stop flashing your ass at the camera and say hello. So rude.

 

(Withleather)

 

— elpresidente, 11:46 am | permalink | 20 comments


Idiot Sox Fan Catchs Foul Ball And Then Drops It In the Celebration

 

Dude, have some pride. Once you drop the ball don't sit there and beg for it back. Just cut your losses and sit down.

 

 

— elpresidente, 11:07 am | permalink | 29 comments


Dude Gets Busted For Groping An Ugly Chicks Ass On the MBTA

k

 

BOSTON -- A man was caught groping a woman on a Dudley Station train Sunday, not long after the MBTA launched a harassment awareness campaign.  44-year-old William H. Crenshaw was arrested after he approached the victim and started threatening her.  The victim was attempting to exit the train when Crenshaw grabbed her buttocks. Transit Police Officers arrived at the scene upon hearing the victim scream.  Crenshaw was charged with indecent assault and battery. He will be arraigned in Roxbury District on Tuesday. The MBTA recently launched a public service campaign to increase awareness of sexual harassment on public transit.  Ads like the one reading, "Rub against me and I'll expose you," were unveiled in several MBTA train stations last week.

Listen I’m not saying that this lady didn’t get her buttocks groped.    But at the same time this story stinks to high heaven.  First of all, if you are going to grab a chicks ass on the subway why would you ever waste your time on this girl?   I mean this woman looks like one of those girls at a bar that you accidentally bump into because she is too fat to avoid and then she gives you the death glare like you tried to roofy her or something.  Second of all, I know that when I grab a random chicks ass I don’t stick around for the fireworks afterwords.  Especially if they scream.  Yet this guy got right in this woman's face.    Who does that?    That’s not the behavior of somebody who just snuck in an ass grab.  You grope it and then you get the hell out of there.  Everybody knows that. The only reason I can think of as to why he stuck around is because he was insulted that this lady insinuated that he groped her ass in the first place.   And I can understand how that would be upsetting.    So before I throw the book at this guy I’d need to hear more details of this case because to me the pieces don’t add up.   It just sounds like McCarthyism at it’s finest.  The MBTA needed to make an example out of an ass groper and this guy was an easy target.

— elpresidente, 10:33 am | permalink | 20 comments


Unusual Hockey Fight After Team Scores Goal

 

I was waiting for Chara and Thomas to square off like this last night, but I digress. I hate criticizing amateur videographers, but god damn this was some bad camera work. How do you expect to create an award winning youtube when you pan away from a fight between a goalie and his defenseman to show the scoreboard? I almost didn't want to post this video because I thought it would be rewarding poor youtubesmanship, but I caved in at the end.

 

— elpresidente, 10:01 am | permalink | 8 comments


Wake Up with Maria Kanellis

MK

Much more Maria here...

Who do you want to Wake Up with? Ub@barstoolsports.com

— unclebuck, 9:27 am | permalink | 13 comments