BARNEGAT, N.J. (AP) - It's the case of the nonexistent ninja. Public schools in Barnegat were locked down briefly after someone reported seeing a ninja running through the woods behind an elementary school. Turns out the ninja was actually a camp counselor dressed in black karate garb and carrying a plastic sword. Police tell the Asbury Park Press the man was late to a costume-themed day at a nearby middle school. The lockdown began shortly after 9 a.m. Wednesday and lasted until 9:30.

I suppose I could make fun of the faculty of the Barnegat, NJ elementary school for overreacting here, but I won't. There've been too many kids taken out of too many schools in body bags for teachers to do anything but err on the side of caution. And the last time I checked, black was still the preferred attire for desperate, disaffected, homicidal youths. So by all means, don't sit there saying "There could a begign reason a sword-toting Ninja is traipsing through the woods behind the school. Let's just assume he's late for a costume party and go back to planning our summer vacations." No, you assume the worst and lock the mutha down and don't worry about getting mocked by smartass bloggers afterward.

I'm pretty much putting the blame on the Ninja here. (Now there's a sentence I never wrote before.) As a general rule, when you're on foot, dressed in a costume, it's best to give the elementary school a wide berth. That would apply whether you're dressed as a Vampire, Elvis, Scream, Jedi, Red Beer Cup... any kind really. But particularly when you're dressed like a stealthy, ancient assassin. You'd think a camp counselor would know better from all that experience eliminating exactly this type of horseplay.