Random Thoughts

Well I can't say I didn't see this one coming. After all you don't become the preeminent smut peddler in New England without knowing freaky hotness when you see it. I first spotted Jenny at our Cinco De Mayo party two years ago and knew instantly I was looking at greatness. And now that greatness has finally been realized in the form of our first ever Sexiest Halloween Costume winner. Congratulations to White Whale Jenny and congrats to me for being so smart.

Anna Blackburn, back row left, and David Withyman, back row fourth from right, in a class photo.

Sydney Morning Herald- A CONVICTED felon who claims his schoolteacher's decision to end their sexual relationship drove him to crime has won the right to sue the state and his ex-lover for breaching their duty of care. David Maurice Withyman, 23, served almost a year in jail after he was convicted for carrying a loaded firearm with the intent to commit an offence, following a series of assaults. But he claims the genesis of his crime spree lay in the termination of his 2003 relationship with the woman he loved, Anna Lucinda Blackburn, who at 28 was the youngest teacher on staff at Carenne Public School... Mr Withyman believed he was "God's gift to women" when at age 17 he started spending time alone with Ms Blackburn in her classroom. They developed a relationship that became sexual after she separated from her husband and moved into her own place. She introduced him to her family and took him to Wagga Wagga for her cousin's 30th birthday. He told a psychologist, Anna Robilliard, he thought it was "cool rooting a teacher"

This is an outrage. Just another case of an industry being threatened by rapacious tort lawyers and their selfish greed. Like Sex Scandal teachers don't have enough to worry about already... school administrators, angry moms, the police... without being sued. And talk about your frivilous lawsuits. If anything, Withyman owes Mrs. Blackburn. How many 17 year olds would love to feel like "God's gift to women," even for one day? Of course its "cool rooting a teacher." So why would he want to ruin it for every other kid? Besides, this case should be thrown out on its merits. If "rooting" your teacher led to a life of crime, then Florida would be the crime capital of the world. I mean, it IS, but that's no reason to kill the whole Sex Teacher industry.

The Grades:
Looks: Anna Lucinda is the oldest 33 year old I've ever seen. Grade: D.
Moral Compass/Bad Judgement: In the whole history of these scandals, she has got to be the first one to bring the kid around to family functions. "Hi, Aunt Betty. I want you to meet David. He's the student I've been statutorily raping that I told you about." Grade: B.
Intangibles: Wagga Wagga? Who names town in Australia? Fozzy Bear? Grade: C.
Overall: C. (Thanks to Martin for the story.)

BEIJING – A newspaper published by China's ruling Communist Party is blasting the latest Guns N' Roses album as an attack on the Chinese nation. Delayed since recording began in 1994, "Chinese Democracy" hit stores in the U.S. on Sunday, although it is unlikely to be sold legally in China, where censors maintain tight control over films, music and publications.  In an article Monday headlined "American band releases album venomously attacking China," the Global Times said unidentified Chinese Internet users had described the album as part of a plot by some in the West to "grasp and control the world using democracy as a pawn."  The album "turns its spear point on China," the article said.  The Global Times article referred only to the title of the album and not to specific song lyrics.  Songs from the album could be heard on Internet sites such as YouTube and the band's MySpace page on Monday and it was not immediately possible to tell whether China's Internet monitors were seeking to block access to it.

Well this should put to rest anybody who still thinks China is a normal place to live.   “Yeah, they’re just like you and me!  It’s just like America over there!”  Huh? They force babies to learn the Balance Beam at 6 weeks old and today the State run newspaper just said GNR was planning to take over the country.  I mean maybe if Slash and Izzy were still in the band they’d have a point, but not this crew.  Axl lost it 20 years ago. And the best part was, they didn’t even listen to the album!  Come on dudes, I'd expect this out of a 3rd world country like Turkey or something, but not the Chinese. So not only are they Communists, they’re stupid too.  How about hearing a song first?  Then if Axl says he’s planning to take over the country you can go ahead and write your little article. How did China get the Olympics again? Does North Korea have a shot in 2016? I know I'm just a "stupid American", but there doesn't seem to be that much of a difference.

PS - If you've heard it, rate Chinese Democracy below. Vote 1 for "Appetite", vote 10 for "The Spaghetti Incident".

Reader Email

El Pres you wanna see something cool done out of beer caps then here you go. Unfortunately I didn't get to put the 04 in because I made it right after the 03 Superbowl. These other beer things people have been sending you come on. The kid at BC prolly got kicked out of his dorm once he showed everyone and the RA came in and looked in his fridge and found beers. The dude at Northeastern hes got lip cancer coming his way. And for me I got every person who steps foot in my apartment admiring the PATS work and having pictures taken with it and telling me I need to keep editing it as we continue to win more Superbowls. So lets get serious if your gonna take the time to make something out of beer caps at least make it have something to do with the most dominating sports franchises in the world. Any Boston team will do. I challenge someone to start drinking Heineken collect the caps and make a 2008 Celtics Champions cap collage, and hey while your at it don't make the same mistake I did, put 09 in there as well.

Jon

Oh Jon. Jon, Jon, Jon. You need to get the "04" Superbowl in there dude. I don't want to say this is totally useless without it, but it totally is. I was all set to give this the first official not lame vote in the history of the Stool, but I just can't do it the way it stands. You need to figure out a way to edit this thing or start over.

PS - Free shirt to whoever submits anything that gets a not lame vote from the Stoolies. It will be a cold day in hell though before that happens.

"They named the kitten 'Eric Mangini'."

LOWELL -- Members of the Lynnfield High School cheerleading team had to ride home with their parents from a competition at Lowell High School on Sunday after their 56-year-old bus driver was charged with accosting girls from the Leominster team. Police said William Diamond, 56, of Danvers, will be summonsed to Lowell District Court to face charges that he offered teenage Leominster cheerleaders $40 to lift their shirts.  Diamond got a summons instead of being arrested, but the Lynnfield team members he drove to the competition still went home with their parents instead of the bus, police said.

Poor Billy Diamond got screwed on like 13 different levels here.    First of all since when is it illegal to offer chicks money in exchange for showing their tits?  I mean it’s not like he fondled them or forced them to do anything against their will.   He made an offer and they refused.  It’s called free trade.    But more importantly what did this have to do with the Lynnfield cheerleaders?   Obviously the reason he propositioned the Leominster team was because he didn’t want to mix business with pleasure.  That’s called being a professional in my book.  And this is how those bitches from Lynnfield repay him?   By refusing to get on the bus ride home and making it seem like he's some sort of sexual deviant?    For shame.

- Thanks to Mr. Mill city for the tip

The Celtics steamrolled over two more teams this weekend - horrendous Minnesota and the junior varsity Raptors. It's been the same story all season, they're kickin' ass but not playing their best ball.

Guess who owns this stat line? 32 pts, 9-23 FG, 9 assists

The answer would be Paul Pierce. Those are his combined numbers for the last three wins over Detroit, Minnesota and Toronto. What's really scary is the C's won those games by an average of 16+ points. Does the rest of the league realize the Celtics are dominating, but they're doing so with inconsistent play? So keep blowing the Lakers and Cavs, because the Celtics have the largest room for improvement. We're not likely to see it until April...and thats a good thing.

Rajon Rondo seems to have gotten his act together lately. And we can thank his new napping schedule. I'm not kidding.

It's become apparent that Perk doesn't give a shit about technicals or the fact that his coach has asked him to calm down. What Perk doesn't get...and I love him on this team...is he's not that good. Refs aren't going to take your BS. They'll give Rasheed Wallace or Ron Artest more slack...because they're elite players.

Chuck - Red's Army

Click Here For the Answer

ProFootballTalk: Not long after we posted the video of Brett Favre’s triumphant tunnel-jog after the Jets defeated the Patriots to start Week Eleven, the video was removed from YouTube, apparently due to a " copyright claim.” Initially, we thought that the video had disappeared because Lord Favre could be heard talking like a sailor... But, as it turns out, it could be that the video disappeared because it contains images of one or more league officials apparently celebrating the win with Jets G.M. Mike Tannenbaum and others. In the video, a portion of which is still available at Deadspin, V.P. of football operations Ray Anderson appears within the first few seconds, walking down the tunnel with a fedora on his head.  He ducks away when he sees the camera.

We’re told that the first guy in the video — whom we’d swear was Red Auerbach wearing a headset if Red Auerbach weren’t presently smoking cigars with Groucho Marx — also is believed to be a league office employee, but we’ve yet to dredge up his name. Later in the video, the unidentified (so far) league official reappears from the right of the lens and says to Tannenbaum, “Michael, I told ya.”

Et tu, NFL? When the unprecedented success of the Patriots dynasty bred resentment among the other teams in the league, I understood it. When Belichick's indifference toward the press led to a relentless, vicious backlash against the team I had no problem with it. When fans of other teams got tired of being humiliated week after week by a superior opponent and created a tsunami of anti-Patriot hatred, I wore it like a badge of honor. Now the NFL can't even create the illusion they're not biased against the Patriots and their executives are grabassing the Jets after the toughest regular season loss of the Belichick era. The next time the Pats lose, why not just give up all pretense. Fire off the confetti cannons, wheel out a platform and have the commissioner come out and present a trophy to coach that beats them.

Now, would anyone like to remind me again that I'm just paranoid and the Pats aren't really treated unfairly?

PS. It bothers the hell out of me that Deadspin gets this stuff before we do.

Reader Email

I am a Turkish graduate student at Vanderbilt and wanted to send you a quick note.  I am a relatively loyal follower of your blog and find it quite entertaining.  While I think it is totally ridiculous for the city of Batman suing Warner Bros. for royalties, it does not give you the right to call an entire country “3^rd world” or judge the existence of democracy there from your home in Boston.  I hope you refrain from that sort of language in the future.  Keep up the good work.  Thanks.

Serdar Sikca

Vanderbilt MBA ‘09

Relax dude, we're playing a game here pal.

Things to consider while hoping CBS can get us some more of that riveting footage of Jake Long getting his ankle taped:

*I'm forming a club. I'm calling it the "I Never Lost Faith in Matt Cassel and Knew Belichick Would Neuter the Wildcat Offense Club." Our first meeting will be at Hooters. I've reserved one of those booths that seat six. That should give us plenty of room to stretch out.

*If Cassel keeps running the ball like he has, we're going to need a name for it. I'm going to suggest the WildCass Offense.

*I think it's a case of the Wildcat was done in not only by Belichick, but by its own success. The Miami passing attack was working, the Wildcat wasn't, but the Dolphins are known for it so they felt like they had to force it. Like when Bart Simpson got famous for saying "I didn't do it" and he had to say it over and over again everywhere he went. The Wildcat became Dan Henning's signature. His catch phrase. And yesterday it officially jumped the shark.

*That's the only explanation. Because can anyone give me a legitimate reason why any team would ever stop throwing on this Patriots defense? Especially in the red zone?

*When the ref flagged Miami for Too Many Men, then reversed himself, did we get a good enough explanation? What was he looking at? Or maybe it's just that NFL referees can only count to 12 when it involves a point spread.

*For all their supposed innovative coaching, the Dolphins are the only team in the NFL playing without a guy at the Dreadlocked Safety position. Seriously, without seeing a DLS back there, I thought Miami was playing a man short the whole game. Time to join the 21st century, Tuna.

To read the rest of this overly optimistic ragtime, click here...

Vs.

Well Hurricane Boston tore through the sunshine state this weekend as both the Bruins and the Pats kicked the shit out of Florida teams and left a wake of destruction in their path.     And at no time was our dominance more evident then when Milan Lucic beat up Nick Boynton in the B’s game and Matt Light beat up Channing Crowder in the Pat’s game.    The only question left after the weekend was who received the bigger beat down?  Personally I’m voting for Crowder.   At least Boyton didn’t run like a little bitch when confronted with a superior human being.  He took his lumps like a man. 

So who do you think got the bigger beatdown? Vote 1 for Boynton, Vote 10 for Crowder

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