COUNTERPOINT: The Girl Bullied By Billionaire For Not Selling Her Instagram Handle is Actually The Crazy One
Kate posted this blog earlier today. If you haven't read the story, the TLDR is that a woman who recently married into a billionaire family asked another woman who's name is the same as her new married name if she would sell her Instagram handle to her. The owner of the handle said no because she likes to post private stories for her friends, and Instagram says selling your account is against the rules. The now-billionaire proceeded to go full blown entitled psycho on her, threatening to have her account suspended, claiming that "Katherine Asplundh" wasn't even her real name, and demanded to see proof of identity.
As far as the internet is concerned, 100% of people are on the side of the woman who didn't sell her handle. Clearly this new money Katherine Asplundh is a terrible person, and it's always great to see someone like that take an L online.
Advertisement
Everyone is talking about what a bitch this girl is. Obviously that's true. Nobody in their right mind would deny the terribleness of this woman. But can we also agree this the original, non-billionaire Katherine Asplundh is perhaps just as, if not even more nuts than than the rich Katherine?
Is it not everybody on social media's dream to be approached in the DM's by a person with unlimited money asking to buy your handle off of you? It's borderline psychotic to not take advantage of that situation. What in the hell are you doing not-rich Katherine?!
It would be one thing if @katherineasplundh. Which is about as ugly of a last name as you can get (but also weirdly fitting for a billionaire). Was some hot shot influencer who was actually profiting off her account. Even if she was putting her account to use at all. But look at this shit. This is the Instagram handle that she simply can't bare to part ways with.
WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING?!?! GET THE FUCKING MONEY YOU MORON!!!
I might even be on the billionaire's side at this point. Imagine reaching out to this account. You have all the money in the world. The username you want is being used by somebody who doesn't even have a profile picture. Then after politely asking her in the DM's, she comes back at you with this shit.
It's not even her main account? She uses it for private stories? SHE DOESN'T WANT TO GET BANNED?!?
Honestly I might lose my shit on this girl too. It wouldn't even be about the handle at that point. It's the principal of the thing. It's wildly financially irresponsible to not sell that account. How fucking stupid can you be to not take the money? How can this Instagram account possibly be that important to her? I was halfway joking at first, but now I'm on rich-Katherine's side. Poor-Katherine is the crazier one. She didn't even bother to throw out a number. Didn't even feel like negotiation.
Advertisement
"Sorry I have some really important private stories to post."
"Instagram says i'M nOt aLLoWeD tO seLL"
Holy shit what an idiot. She's afraid of getting in trouble? Just give the rich girl your god damn phone number and negotiate off the app if you're so worried about "getting in trouble". Unless I'm maybe wrong about the handle in question? But I can't be, right? According to the article in the NY Post, the Instagram handle @katherineasplundh was the handle in question.
Katherine Asplundh, formally Driscoll, married Pennsylvania tree service heir Cabot Asplundh on April 27 and wanted to make the celebration Instagram official and change her name on the platform to match her new legal name.
But there was one catch, the desired handle @katherineasplundh was already taken.
In an attempt to get her way, Asplundh messaged the owner of the coveted account under her social media profile still named @katherinedrisc, an ode to her maiden name.
That's the fucking handle! It's so insane that now I've convinced myself that I must be missing something. But that's it! It says @katherineasplundh right there! And even worse, now that @katherineasplundh has the whole internet in her corner, she's not taking advantage of it in the slightest. It just sits there doing absolutely nothing. Beyond psycho behavior.
Now people have scooped up every possible iteration of a Katherine Asplundh handle they can possibly think of. There are almost no Katherine Asplundh adjacent handles remaining. All of Reddit is on the same page of "BY NO MEANS SELL YOUR ACCOUNT TO THIS WOMAN. STAND STRONG!"
No. Fuck that. I will not stand strong. Except now these idiots have diluted the market. Even if this girl tries to by a random account, and only offers $100, if you try to go any higher she'll just move on the one of the other thousand accounts. God damn it I'm getting worked up now. An all-time bag fumble as the kids say. Just insanely stupid. I said earlier in this blog that nobody in their right mind would deny this girls bitchiness, but I think I'm denying it now. Trying to deal with unreasonable people who just refuse to make the logical decision is so infuriating. I'd have lost my shit too.