If The Phillies Are Serious About Winning A World Series, They'll Make Every Night A BOGO Hot Dog Night So Bryce Harper Can Continue To Mash
Tim Nwachukwu. Getty Images.When the Phillies announced they were getting rid of the Dollar Dog Night promotion, there was reason to be upset as fans. Dollar Dogs were a staple of showing up to Citizens Bank Park during the spring and annihilating as many grease rockets as humanly possible.
Now they ended up replacing the promotion with Hatfield Franks BOGO Nights. Which…I mean…in this economy? It's not terrible. You're still getting a couple of dogs for a couple dollars a pop. You can't be shelling out $600 million to two players and still expect to be able to keep the lights on when you're giving away hot dogs for a dollar. The PECO bill has to surge every time the Phillies get a strikeout and you get the 'K' lights flickering.
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So BOGO Night certainly isn't the worst replacement of all time. And especially not when you consider the fact that Bryce Harper turns into the most dangerous man to ever play the game when the boys and girls at CBP can get a nice little deal on meat missiles.
This fucking guy. He just always knows how to show up for the moment.
The Phillies are on a nuclear warpath right now. They've won 7 straight games and have the best record in baseball. They've only lost 3 games since your taxes were due. But we have to mention that most of these wins have been coming against sub-.500 ball clubs. I'm not saying they can't come out and have the same success against playoff teams. And it's great to see a great team absolutely murder bad teams like they're supposed to do. But at the same time…well it would just be nice to get a little reassurance that this team will still slug the shit out of the ball against better competition.
So all the Phillies need to do is fire up the BOGO Dog Nights for the rest of the season. Clearly something magical happens when there's a drastic influx of glizzies in the park. Something about that extra layer of grease in the air helps Bryce Harper violently launch baseballs into orbit. Just imagine what this offense could look like with a BOGO Dog Night during Wawa Hoagiefest? They might put up a 50 burger.
That's all it takes. Are the Phillies serious about winning a world championship? Are they willing to take a loss on hot dogs if it means they bring that trophy back to Philly? I sure as heck hope so.