Why are nickels bigger than dimes? A first hand account

Last night I stumbled upon a troubling realization about our American currency. But before I get into that, please ignore the fact that yesterday I forgot how much a dime was worth. That is so clearly not an important aspect in this scenario. And while you’re forgetting that, humor me and ask yourself something, why are nickels bigger than dimes? Really think about it. Allow logic to take over, and then try to come up with a legitimate answer. Hopefully, you realized how shocking it is that our nation has survived for over 200 years without questioning why our nickels are bigger than our dimes but are somehow worth less? Allow me to keep questioning you. Do you enjoy chaos? Are you an anarchist? If you answered yes to either of these questions, then you’re a nickel sympathizer, and probably a communist. Also, to the horny Indian man who stole my identity. Are you happy now? Is this what you wanted? To see me humiliated in my local game stop? I hope you got laid because if that was your goal, then you really are a sick individual. But, if your goal was to raise awareness towards the troubling fallacy of our dime size, then I applaud your showmanship, and I will happily be your martyr.

P.S. The dime is also smaller than the penny.