White Trash Haymakers Were Abundant During The 49ers/Dolphins Game

Oh, you mean the drunk who consciously wore a Steelers jersey to a 49ers vs. Dolphins game in Miami instigated the brawl? Shocker. Not to mention that pre-pubescent mustache reeks of unemployment with a dash of racism and Sheetz. And is there no security in Miami? If this were The 700 Level everyone involved would’ve been hogtied, arrested, tried, and left to rot in the jail underneath the stadium by the time this brawl concluded. Whatever. But props to the Suh’s for at least holding the high ground while throwing their drunken haymakers. I’d say they studied the strategy in Sun Tzu’s Art Of War, but I’d also say any sort of literacy outside of Big Un’s would be a stretch for this kind.

One thing’s for damn sure, everyone’s lucky these weapons of mass redneck destruction didn’t make an appearance for the fight. Those bombs haven’t been milked since her third kid dropped out when she was 17 and are ready to blow.

Sweet authentic team NFL gloves on the grown man, too. Lock of the century there’s Stickem on those bad boys. You don’t sink to that level without going all out.