Our Latest Gender Reveal Mishap Involved Fireworks Mistakenly Being Shot At Friends And Family Members
Another day, another victory for those of us on #TeamGenderReveal. Yeah I hate getting my social media timelines clogged up by poofs of blue and pink smoke about people I don’t know or care about as much as the next guy. But as people in their 20s and 30s continue to try to one-up their friends and/or go viral, the chance for a mishap with people screaming in terror as the parents-to-be reveal themselves to be terribly unfit to support their lives let alone another life goes up exponentially. Simply getting to the point where two people that will soon be in charge of a baby’s well-being thought lighting off fireworks on a drying rack was a good idea is like watching Darwin’s theory of evolution in rewind.
It started with a mom taking a frozen rope off the face
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Escalated to a dad breaking his ankle (warning: very loud video)
Pivoted to emotional pain as Gordon Hayward got his guts ripped out by a handful of pink balloons
And now a video where we could have learned what the gender of a family’s next member was going to be at the same time we learned how the last family member to die perished. That’s some real Circle of Life shit as well as the perfect balance that Thanos was always looking for.
So while everyone else continues to cry about the amount of gender reveals, I will happily sit back and wait to see if the next gender reveal fail to go superviral involves someone going JPP on themselves, driving off a cliff, or some other crazy “creative” way to tell the world that their future baby has a penis or a vagina, which will likely result in them being in a different wing of the hospital while their kid is being born.