Today In Nails: Lenny Dykstra Is Indicted On Charges Of Possession Of Meth, Coke, And Making Terroristic Threats

SI – Former Mets and Phillies outfielder Lenny Dykstra was indicted on three counts by a grand jury in Union County N.J. on Wednesday per TMZ Sports. Dykstra faced charges for possession of meth, possession of cocaine and making terroristic threats. The three-time All-Star was arrested in May after reportedly “putting a weapon to the head of an Uber driver and threatening to kill him.” After the driver stopped his car and ran from Dykstra outside a police station at around 3:30 a.m., authorities arrested Dykstra and found evidence of cocaine and meth in his bag. Police didn’t recover a weapon during Dykstra’s arrest per the New York Daily News. Dykstra’s arrest in May wasn’t his first moment of legal trouble since retiring in 1996. He pled no contest to grand theft auto charges in 2011 and pled guilty to bankruptcy fraud in 2012.

And that’s that. Lenny isn’t a stranger to the clink. Here is a plea after his latest stint in prison where Nails campaigns for a new set of teeth because he got them all knocked out in the slammer, something I originally couldn’t decide if the video was hilarious or sad (I have since concluded it is sad):

Regardless, it seems like Dykstra could be going back to jail for a long, long time after this indictment. The police body cam footage from the day Dykstra was arrested with the Uber driver is some wild and sad stuff. Here’s that entire exchange that I’m conveniently gonna re-blog verbatim from earlier in the year (h/t Clickbait Smits):

And here’s the Uber driver, who looks obviously distressed.

Yeah…Dykstra has now filed charges on the Uber driver for false imprisonment. But after watching this, it may not work out well for Nails. Without the video evidence, normally I’d question the Uber driver in this seemingly simple situation. What driver wouldn’t change the destination and cause a fuss? But then I realized this is Lenny Dykstra. He probably got a hot stock tip and wanted to alter the route from Blackwood, NJ to the second sun in the Andromeda Galaxy. That man hasn’t been with “It” for a long, long time. That included when he played. But one would assume these body cam videos should seal the deal for the the uber driver, who is in my opinion too rattled to be acting. He also makes a great point: “If I was kidnapping him, why would I bring him here?”. Wild stuff.

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Dykstra’s elevator never went all the way to the top, but now that thing is just stuck in the basement with no hope of repair. When Lenny was catfished and crashed Barstool HQ last year, you can tell the man had some demons. And by some I mean all of them. All the demons. We didn’t know what Nails was on, and didn’t wanna know. Seeing my childhood hero reduced to a toothless vagabond while attempting to hit on the then 19-year-old intern asking Ria if she wanted to “Take a ride in (on?) his spaceship” was not a pleasant sight. He also brought in a full suitcase that, once we found out wasn’t a bomb, was filled solely with pictures of him to autograph.

We all know Lenny Dykstra is a genuine dick. It’s been well documented in the past and he should reap what he sows. But it’s still sad stuff to see, especially after the Phillies celebrated the 25th anniversary of the ’93 Phils just this past Sunday. Dykstra was obviously nowhere to be found. Well, it’s tough to be places when you’re defending yourself during a sidewalk news conference and dropping “You’re talking to a man who stuck a flag on Mt. Kilamajario and walked the depths of Death Valley, could it ever be imagined I’d be kidnapped by an Uber Driver?”. Power Nails only.