Throwback: These Are The Best Special Moves In Tony Hawk's Pro Skater History. If You Disagree, You Are Wrong
It’s an interesting time out there in the world of video games. We’ve got 16-year-olds winning $3M for being really good at Fortnite. We’ve got Ninja moving from Twitch to Mixer for what I can only imagine is a completely preposterous amount of money. And we’ve got pretty much every single player in the NFL riled up about their rating in the new Madden game. For people like myself who aren’t gamers and never made it past the Xbox 360 days, it could feel like a strange new world out there. And while new may not always be terrible, it’s also fun to just think back on the simpler days and reminisce about the greatest video game series ever created; Tony Hawk’s Pro Skater.
So with that in mind, I figured I’d go back in time a little to one of my favorite blogs I’ve written here at Barstool Sports [dot] com. My definitive ranking of the greatest special tricks in THPS. You can disagree with the list if you’d like to. But just know that this would make you the dumbest stupid idiot on planet Earth.
10. The 900
Okay so I don’t want to spend too much time on the 900. It’s a revolutionary move, yes. But anybody who has ever put on the moon gravity cheat for THPS knows that spinning 2 and a half full rotations ain’t shit. So sure, it set the standard for special moves. But it’s nothing more, nothing less. Take it or leave it.
9. Christ Air
The Christ Air will forever hold a special place in my heart. Because when the original THPS came out, I don’t think we’d seen that move get pulled in real life before. But as time has passed, I feel like I could see some little 12 year old kid on Instagram land a Christ Air these days. We’ve also seen the Christ Air landed in a surfing competition not too long ago so it’s not exactly “special” anymore. Plus I’m a big fan of the separation of church and state. So putting Christ in THPS is a little problematic. That being said, it was one of the original GOAT moves and belongs in the top 10.
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8. Might As Well Jump
Only reason it’s not higher up on the list is because it should be named “Midas Whale Jump”.
7. Kickflip Superman
Just a super clean looking move. It’s the kind of shit like the Kickflip Superman that you know you can pull in the 1st heat of a competition and you’re set to win after that. Don’t even have to land another trick in the other 2 heats to get the gold. Money in the bank.
6. The Jackass
Quick shoutout to Bam Margera for bringing this trick into existence. Whenever I see “The Jackass”, I’m reminded of a better time. Back when Viva La Bam was still a show and Ryan Dunn was still alive and Bam wasn’t in the middle of a full blown meltdown.
5. Slamma Jamma
Not a racist thing here but you know how hype black people act whenever somebody throws down in a dunk contest. Well the Slamma Jamma elicits the same reaction out of me. Unfortunately it would just be myself playing THPS alone in my room instead of in a packed gymnasium with a whole squad. But the point remains.
4. Sacktap
Listen. That’s just a funny ass move. If you can’t laugh at the sacktap then you can’t enjoy life. Doesn’t matter if you’re 10 or 25 or 50. You pull off the sacktap in THPS, you’re at least giggling.
3. Casper Slide
Let me tell you something, folks. Hit me up with the perfect balance cheat, a bottle of Mountain Dew and a plate full of Bagel Bites, and I’ll keep a Casper Slide going until the cows come home. Which is usually around 5:37pm CST.
2. Kickflip McTwist
Morgan Freeman’s voice. Butter. Ryan Gosling in “Crazy, Stupid, Love”. And the Kickflip McTwist.
That right there is my Mt. Rushmore for things that are smooth.
1. The Darkslide
It may not have the flash of some of the moves above. It may not have the airtime or the funny name or what have you. But the Darkslide is the GOAT and there’s no debating it. You’re not fucking around when you throw out the Darkslide. It’s strictly business. It’s strictly to prove that you’re better than everybody else out there. Like I said, you can feel free to disagree if you want. But just know that you’ve never been more wrong about anything in your entire life.