Cliff Kellerman Doubles Down on Brady Being a 'Dink & Dunk' Quarterback
“First of all, about the Cliff. Every, single number for Tom Brady across the board, all the important numbers when you dig in, are way down. He’s dinking and dunking more than ever even by his own standards. Much, much worse under pressure, etc. …
Nevertheless, when you’re a game manager who’s big on 3rd and play when it matters most? [Chuckle. Guffaw. Giggle. Chortle.] That’s … y’know … there’s nothing more can be said about that.”
— Max Kellerman’s reaction to Tom Brady signing a two-year contract extension that will take him SIX years beyond his predicted “cliff.”
Oh, Cliff Kellerman. You magnificent, relentless, ridiculous, masochistic rodeo clown. What would we do without you? You couldn’t be more determined to take abuse if you were being taken out of a box with in a leather mask with a zipper across the mouth and a leash around your neck. And in a way, I almost admire the persistence. It’s rare that anyone has faith that is a unshakable as this. Especially when their beliefs are so patently, objectively wrong.
For the purposes of this post, I’ll skip over all the excuse-making about how Tom Brady only hasn’t hit his cliff because the NFL protects quarterbacks in a way they never did before. Because we’ve been hearing that argument in some shape or form since the invention of the Roughing the Passer rule. I guarantee you the first time someone drew a flag for RTP, fake hardos across the country screamed, “Why don’t we just put a dress on ‘im!” like somehow it’s not in football’s best interest to protect their highest paid, most recognizable assets. Like somehow in a league that can’t find 32 capable starters, there’s this nationwide burning desire to watch backups play. Never forget that NOT protecting the quarterback was the major marketing strategy of Vince McMahon’s XFL. And you wouldn’t know how that worked out because neither you or anyone else was watching. Anyway, the rules are applied to all QBs everywhere and make perfect sense, so that’s a non-starter.
Featured on Barstool
Instead, let’s talk about Cliff’s first point: Dink and Dunk Hypothesis. The System Quarterback argument. The notion that Brady is only good because he doesn’t throw deep. As if somehow playing quarterback is a booth at the State Fair where you prove your manhood in a feat of strength in front of the smelly carnie for a knockoff trademark-infringed stuffed animal from China. And not about efficiently moving the ball upfield to score points.
In Brady’s case, we’ve been hearing this same narrative since “Jackass” was still on MTV. Since he started making stars out of his slot receivers like Troy Brown and 3rd down backs like Kevin Faulk So how has Brady been on deep throws over the years? Not good. Historically good:
And now? Is Cliff Kellerman’s theorem that because of Brady’s frail, advanced age he’s been reduced to two feeble throws, the dink and the occasional dunk? Well, in terms of sheer number of deep throws, defined by Pro Football Focus as attempts targeted at 20 yards or more downfield, that would be a NO:
His 65 Attempts ties him with the very young and virile Jared Goff. Good for 11.4% of his throws which puts him ahead of the manly, prime-of-his-life Dak Prescott, the strong and youthful Deshaun Watson and the not-at-all-over-the-hill Matthew Stafford and Drew Brees.
And his 11.4 % of Deep Attempts:
… puts him ahead of those guys as well as the nowhere-near-his-cliff Andrew Luck as well. Though when the guy who far and away led the league in that metric was Josh Allen, I don’t know that you want to die on that argumentative hill.
So he threw Brady throws the ball deep a lot. That doesn’t mean he’s good at it, right? Wrong:
So, am I right that Patrick Mahomes and Jared Goff are the new gold standard of aggressive, deep-throwing gunslingers who neither dink nor do they dunk? Who fearlessly air it out in their state-of-the-art, high-octane, nitro-powered adrenaline rush passing attacks? If you’re looking for their names on this chart, Brady is wedged right in their between them. Between those two new Top Guns who are surrounded by the 1A/1B best skill position groups and several of the best deep threats in the NFL. Whereas Brady was throwing to a ragtag collection of partially suspended wideouts and a mostly injured tight end. And yet his 104.1 rating on throws of 20+ yards would’ve ranked him sixth best in the league overall.
But be that as it may, keep trying, Cliff. You are the Best System Buffoon in the broadcast industry. You might not dunk, but you for sure are a dink. Never stop trolling. Don’t ever admit defeat. And as always, don’t ever, ever let the facts get in the way of your bullshit false narrative. The ironic thing is that you fell off the Brady Cliff you constructed long before he did.
Here’s my reminder to you once again to NOT @ Kellerman on Twitter @MaxKellerman. He hates when you do that.