SELECTION SUNDAY: Ranking The Sopranos Episodes 1-64
Today was supposed to be Selection Sunday. It's not. I know, I'm sad about it too. However, life is what you make of it, so I decided to do my own selection show centered around The Sopranos.
In total, The Sopranos had 87 episodes. I have decided to rank them 1-87, but only 64 of them will make this bracket. To make things more fun, I have decided to put the 15 & 16 seeds as my 8 least favorite episodes.
Am I a Sopranos expert? No. I'm not pretending to be. I've watched it through probably 4 times, but I'm not David Fucking Chase. You're going to disagree with me at some point. I hope that disagreement leads to a productive conversation in the comments or on Twitter!
1 SEED
1. College (Season 1, Episode 5)
"Are you in the Mafia?"
2. Long Term Parking (Episode 5, Season 12)
RIP Ade.
3. Armour Fou (Episode 3, Season 13)
The meeting of Gloria and Carmella? Perfect.
4. Whoever Did This (Season 4, Episode 9)
Some people didn't love the Pie-O-My storyline, but I'll never forget Tony killing Ralphie over a fucking horse. “It was a Fucking horse! What, are you a vegetarian? You eat beef and sausage by the carload.”
16 SEED
64. In Camelot (5.7)
The storyline of Tony meeting his father's mistress? I could have done without. That same mistress doing the Marilyn Monroe Happy Birthday song? I'll never forget. Scaring.
63. All Happy Families (5.4)
Carm fucking AJ's teacher? Again, could've done without.
62. Join The Club (6.2)
The storyline of Tony Soprano turning into Kevin Finnerty while he was in a coma almost made me hate the show.
61. The Test Dream (5.11)
Similar to Join The Club, this episode focused around a fake world that Tony was in. I hated it. It turned a Mafia show into some book that I'd read in college.
2 SEED
5. Pine Barrens (3.1)
A great episode. Just a bit overrated.
6. Denial, Anger, Acceptance (1.3)
This was an EPIC scene:
7. Isabella (1.12)
I poo-pooed the dreams/coma in the 16 seed section, but Tony's hallucinations of the Italian exchange student next door made for a good episode. Plus, Isabella? Smokeshow.
8. Fortunate Son (3.3)
DONT DISRESPECT THE PIZZA PARLOR!
15 SEED
60. Moe n' Joe (6.10)
The Vito storyline in New Hampshire? Wasn't for me.
59. Unidentified Black Males (5.9)
This was the start of the Vito & Finn storyline. I hated Finn. I didn't mind Vito, but the combination of them two? The worst.
58. A Hit Is A Hit (1.10)
Adriana and Christopher getting into the music business was a huge swing and a miss.
57. D-Girl (2.7)
We get it, Christopher doesn't want to be in the mob.
3 SEED:
9. The Strong Silent Type (4.10)
10. Commendatori (2.4)
Paulie's trip to Italy was nothing short of fantastic.
11. White Caps (4.13)
12. Meadowlands (1.4)
4 SEED
13. Funhouse (2.13)
Another great episode that is a bit overrated.
14. Made In America (6.21)
15. Kennedy & Heidi (6.18)
16. No Show (4.2)
Meadow deserves all the hype:
5 SEED
17. Christopher (4.3)
Also known as the Christopher Columbus Day episode. I don't hate this episode as much as others. Some have this as their most hated.
18. Soprano Home Movies (6.13)
19. The Blue Comet (6.20)
20. Mr. & Mrs. John Sacrimony Request (6.5)
Johnny Sac crying like a child in front of everybody was a massive scene in my opinion.
6 SEED:
21. Macro Polo (5.8)
22. Long (1.2)
23. The Happy Wanderer (2.6)
24. Pax Soprana (1.6)
7 SEED:
25. Pie-O-My (4.5)
I HATED how Janice made Bobby eat his wives last meal. Janice makes my SKIN boil.
26. For All Debts Public And Private (4.1
27. Everybody Hurts (4.6)
28. The Legend Of Tennessee Moltisanti (1.8)
8 SEED
29. Army Of One (3.13)
30. Boca (1.9)
31. I Dream Of Jeannie Cusamano (1.13)
32. Big Girls Don't Cry (2.5)
9 SEED
33. Irregular Around The Margin (5.5)
34. Stage 5 (6.14)
35. Toodle-Fucking-Oo (2.3)
36. Live Free or Die (6.6)
10 SEED
37. Where's Johnny (5.3)
38. The Knight in White Satin Armor (2.12)
39. All Due Respect (5.13)
40. University (3.6)
11 SEED
41. He Is Risen (3.8)
42. Cold Stones (6.11)
43. Cold Cuts (5.10)
44. Second Opinion (3.7)
12 SEED
45. Full Leather Jacket (2.8)
46. Kaisha (6.12)
47. Employee Of The Month (3.4)
48. The Telltale Moozadell (3.9)
13 SEED
49. The Second Coming (6.19)
50. The Weight (4.4)
51. Bust-Out (2.10)
52. Merger & Acquisitions (4.8)
14 SEED
53. Another Toothpick (3.5)
54. Sentimental Education (5.6)
55. Members Only (6.1)
56. Remember When (6.15)