Advertisement

I Don't Believe Olivia Culpo For One Second When She Tells Christian McCaffrey's Mom That They Are Virgins

Seems like an innocent Instagram, right? Just hanging out on a boat, being a rich, hot famous couple. Seems like the life - even if those chicken sandwiches could use a bit of work. Is there even chicken in Olivia's sandwich? You need a real Nashville hot chicken if you're going to go like that, but I digress. I happened to notice a couple comments: 

To be frank, I don't believe her. I'm starting to wonder what else Olivia Culpo has lied about. You can't be lying to your boyfriend's mom who you've been quarantined with that you're not fucking. Also pretty weird for your boyfriend's mom to ask you to get a room. Prefer my mom not to make that sort of line, but that's just me. 

Now why don't I believe her? Let's look at some evidence here. I present evidence 1: 

If your ex posts a caption about fucking crazy sex, you're having fucking crazy sex. That's just a fact. You can't go from that sort of sex life to being a virgin with McCaffrey. 

Evidence 2: 

Advertisement

If you can put someone into tight leather pants, you know how to take someone out of tight leather pants. Spot the lie. 

And finally evidence 3, the only reason you clicked, pictures of her. Let's be honest, that's the point of the blog: 

Advertisement