The Great Debate: Is It Too Early For Pumpkin Beer/Oktoberfests/Fall Beers to Be On Shelves?

Nate8/14/2014 3:46 PM

So last night I went food shopping because you can only eat out/order in for every meal for 3 weeks until you have to get your act together and go to the store. While perusing the aisles I found myself in the beer aisle and noticed it was overstocked with pumpkin beer. Pumpkin beer here, there everywhere. Was poking me in the eyes, I couldn’t escape it. Now it’s a given that pumpkin beers and Oktoberfests are the best seasonal beers money can buy. I’m not talking the shitty Blue Moon pumpkin which tastes like cat piss, I’m talking the shit that you spend money on and makes your mouth cum. However, I whipped out my iPhone 5s and looked at the date and saw it was merely August 14th. And there wasn’t a summer beer in sight, all fall seasonals. And it left me stumped..is it too early for fall beers?

On one hand, no, it’s never too early for delicious beer. If they offered it 24/7, 365, I would buy it, simply because it’s delicious and you don’t need an excuse to enjoy anything that’s delicious. What if one day someone decided pizza was a winter-only food. Would you be mad if they started offering it in the summer? Of course not.

But on the other hand, we have seasons and seasonal beer for a reason. It’s something to look forward to. When the leaves start changing and the NFL is kicking back up, and then you stumble upon your favorite fall beers, it’s just a big bang of wonderfulness unlike anything else. So if the fall beers are already out before mid-August, do they lose their luster?

I hate that I have to say this, but there are hardos who are like “BRO, ONLY DRINK BUD HEAVYS BROOOOOOOOO”. Fuck off. You drink what you like in your pink shorts, I’ll drink what I like on my couch. We aren’t talking about pumpkin lattes from Starbucks, which are pretty good too by the way, we’re talking about beer. You drink Buds and Millers to get drunk, you drink flavorful beers when you just want a few with dinner.

So is August 14th too early for Fall beers? Vote 1 if you won’t have a sip of Pumking until college football starts, Vote 10 if there’s never too much of a good thing, drink up old sport.