Absolutely Devastating News: The Downtown & South Side Irish Parades Have Been Cancelled For The Second Straight Year

Carl2/04/2021 9:00 PM

Maybe not exactly "News" because you figure Chicago's going to be dead last lifting general public health restrictions. But at the same time I've personally been holding out hope that we'd get a formal Saturday to absolutely rip this city apart. Obviously there's still going to be some action with plenty of benders to tie on across this city. You just wished coming into February that we'd be able to unite as one city as we embark upon our great recreational awakening. Unfortunately it looks like we'll be punting indefinitely with my brain anchoring to the next great outdoor social celebration: Cinco de Mayo.

You think I'm joking but there's a broad and inclusive portion of my friends that call me Chili Pepper because I've been known to turn up the temperature with some tequila in my stomach. I don't know if that really makes sense but I succinctly want to make you aware that I happen to love May 5th. Every ounce of logic suggests we need to circle it and start preparing the battle plans. Maybe even WSD knows a Taco Van guy?

Only time will tell. For now I suppose it's worth remembering and celebrating two distinctly amazing parties in Chicago that will again fall by the wayside to COVID protocol. For the Downtown parade, that robs a huge group of youngsters taking the train in at an unreasonably risky age to explore Chicago for the first time with their buddies. There's huge union-backed parties and fundraisers and all this officially sanctioned day drinking that effectively puts this city in a fantastic mood.

On the South Side, no Irish Parade means another year without the ritual family party where everyone who can tangentially be considered a cousin gets together under one roof. There's no fights at Beverly park or February-saving alcohol sales for the Western bars while nearly every Mt. Greenwood crockpot remains unplugged. I'm not exaggerating when I call it the community's premier holiday event on the entire calendar.

I get there's bigger agendas at play but for just one minute, let me take a moment to say this blows. Especially for the countless souls out there that are so dependent on a good social scene to get you through the weeks/months/years of your 20's. There was a point in my life where making it from Monday to the Friday pregame was the hardest thing I ever had to do consistently. And I know unequivocally that isn't a unique phase to my life. So many people now and in the past can relate to that sentiment, and it sucks there's nothing you can do about it right now. For what it's worth (nothing) I'm here for you.

That's why I think we need to circle back on Cinco de Mayo and go all gas no brakes. Maybe by then Chicago will be ready or maybe not. Either way I'll be ready and I hope you assholes are coming with.

Until then...