Messi Was Greeted By Thousands Of Fans Going WILD And Lighting Off Fireworks At The Airport As He Arrived In Paris
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MESSI!!!
I usually judge the size of a soccer moment based on how much it resembles a legitimate riot breaking out, so I'll give the French a 3.25 Balls on this celebration. Thousands of people gathering together just for the chance to catch a glimpse of a human is impressive, as is lighting off fireworks directly outside of an airport, which seems like it should be against some sort of law. I feel like if a bunch of gabagool Yankees fans started popping off M-80s to grant Anthony Rizzo at JFK, all of them would have at least 3 GTA wanted stars immediately.
However, I have to deduct precious points on the Balls scale for the overall scene. While the vibes may be right and these maniacs have their hearts in the right place for greeting someone that is essentially a God to a good chunk of the world, the French's flare game is WEAK.
Any soccer celebration worth its salt has enough flares and fireworks to turn the skies redder than the Upside Down in Stranger Things. Maybe that will happen if Messi can ever lead PSG to a Champions League title like my beloved Chelsea just won. However, I imagine even that moment will not come close to the scene in Paris after France won the World Cup back when Caleb and Rone were chasing championship riots like the lunatics they are.