A German Ballet Director Got Revenge On A Harsh Critic By Calmly And Rationally Smearing A Bag Of Dog Shit On Her Face During A Performance

CNN — The director of a leading German ballet company is being investigated by police and has been suspended for smearing dog feces on a critic's face after taking offense to a review she wrote.

According to an article published in the Frankfurter Allgemeine Zeitung (FAZ) on Sunday, Marco Goecke, the head of Hanover State Opera's ballet company, allegedly verbally attacked journalist Wiebke Hüster during the intermission of a ballet premiere performance. The confrontation seems to have been spurred by a previous review that Hüster had written, according to the newspaper.

FAZ reports that Goecke threatened to ban their critic from the Hannover State Opera, and then smeared a paper bag with dog feces in her face.

Look, I think we can all agree what our boy Marco did here was probably not the best way to respond to a slight. You can't just go around smearing bags of dog shit in people's faces because you feel like it.

With that said, however, I like the cut of his jib.

You have to pick and choose your spots with the dog poop bit, but everybody now knows Marco Goecke is not one to fuck with. Every journalist in Germany is going to think twice before giving a negative review of one of this guy's ballet shows. He did what he felt was necessary to defend his work.

Sometimes, you have to go to some extreme lengths to prove a point. There's now no doubt who holds the German Ballet Bad Boy crown. I'll go so far as to say there isn't a close second. Marco is in a league of his own.