Dan Campbell Can't Coach Football Without An Enormous Fucking Lip In
I knew Dan Campbell dipped, but WOWWWWWZA. Even with the understanding that the guy has a high nicotine tolerance and played in the NFL as a tight end at 6-5, 265 pounds, that is a grown-ass-man-sized head buzz going straight to your bloodstream.
Stunned at the cameraperson's work here. To just linger on the whole process while the telecast continues to play as if nothing is amiss? I couldn't stop laughing.
Seriously though, can somebody check on this man? There's no way he isn't perpetually dehydrated, right? Between THAT big of a packed lip and this prolific rate of coffee consumption...
...I don't know. I'm concerned. The Detroit Lions are on the cusp of a major turnaround. They're favored to win the NFC North somehow. Campbell has rolled his sleeves up, embraced the blue-collar mentality of the city he coaches in, and has the Lions' culture headed in the right direction after years of toxicity, dysfunction and losing.
We need to keep Dan Campbell alive!! He's still in excellent shape. He's only 47 years young. Still, any human body can only take so much. That caffeine-nicotine combination is a game of life with which I am not familiar. Maybe that's why Campbell has been such a high achiever his whole adult life. Then again, I literally have zero idea how he gets a wink of sleep with that dosage of stimulants coursing through his body every single day.
The Lions training staff must be IVing Campbell every evening. Did a quick Google and see that Reags blogged about Campbell's vices last year. Campbell is a Copenhagen man. No wintergreen. Straight-up. I was a Grizzly wintergreen long cut guy myself back in the day. Couldn't handle it past the age of 21. Had to go to pouches. Thankfully quit about a year later.
I hesitate to glorify this level of tobacco use like not-his-real-name Warren Sharp and his innately untrustworthy mustache do at the top of this blog. I hope Campbell figures out a way to cut himself off someday. Until then, what else can we do but embrace Campbell for who he is? He's letting the world know upfront one of his flaws as a human being.
Maybe there's hope for Campbell yet in the NFL coaching fraternity, because Mike McDaniel allegedly went cold turkey once he was caught vaping during the playoffs.
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