This Is Phuc Kieu, And He Was Arrested In Florida For..You Guessed It...Jumping In Another Man's Car And Trying To Rip His Clothes Off

Florida - An Orlando man was arrested in Gainesville Sunday afternoon after another man said he tried to rape him and steal the money he had just withdrawn from a credit union. A man told Gainesville Police Department officers he had just withdrawn money from a walk-up ATM at 4:25 p.m. from the Campus USA credit union at 1900 SW 34th St. and walked near a Honda Civic occupied by a man identified as 58-year-old Phuc X. Kieu. The man told police Kieu jumped out, pulled him into the driver’s seat of the Honda, straddled him and tried to pull off his clothes, according to a GPD booking report. The man wrestled himself out of the Honda, and Kieu tried to pull off his backpack as he ran away, the report states. He eventually broke free of Kieu’s grasp and ran to a nearby shopping center yelling, “Rapist!” At some point, the $220 the man had withdrawn went missing, the report states. Police officers determined that Kieu had been watching gay pornography in the driver’s seat of the Honda with a portable DVD player before he is accused of attacking the victim. Kieu, whose name was verified by GPD officers, was booked into the Alachua County jail on charges of sexual assault, kidnapping and robbery without a weapon.

What a way to end the first day of Thanksgiving Week. A story of a man named Phuc Kieu who was watching gay porn and then tried to bang and rob a man, all in the great state of Florida. Shel Silverstein himself couldn’t have written anything as poetic as that. Monday is in the books.