Has Anybody Ever Backfired Sucking Up To The CEO More Than I Backfired With These Emails?

Fuckin Nardini. This was Friday evening. I had spent the entire day trying to grow the company by drinking daiquiris in the office with the PMT crew at 11AM and activating my professional network only to get stuffed in a locker by the CEO. Just comes at me with basically a typical unprovoked Portnoy jab. Response came in like 8 seconds after I sent. Unreal. What the hell do I tell people about that? “Hey I inquired with our CEO but she called me a crosseyed fuck so not really sure what that means for the hiring process? We’d love to hire you but you gotta have bananaland eyes or a spider monkey alter ego?” It’s nuts. What a Friday the Barstool business had. Interviewed a million prepared interns only to hire Glenny Balls and then this. Company’s about to blow the roof off the internet. Nobody can get in our way. Especially not ourselves.