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Pamela Anderson Is Almost 50 Years Old Fake Fucking Herself In A New Sex Toy Ad For Valentine's Day

The more NSFW explicit version is on Vimeo if you want to check it out. Now I’ve got a soft spot for Pamela Anderson so I’m predisposed to appreciate this commercial; one of my first memories of masturbation was some Playboy double issue with her and Jenny McCarthy setting unrealistic expectations with busty blondes for me for the next couple decades of my life. So in some respects it’s nice to see her still flaunting her sexuality out there for things, even if it’s a much more poorly lit and quickly cut version of her than it used to be.

But it’s also sort of like I’ve critiqued Madonna for…at a certain point, shouldn’t the gameplan change a little bit? Maybe some sort of “I’m a sexy older MILF commercial” or something taking ownership of where she is in the world now instead of expecting that her writhing around and blasting herself with a marital aid is enough to move product? I’m not saying I should be the manager for every aging celeb who previously coasted on sexuality here but it’s not the worst idea.

Also totally random…it gets weirder with current Pamela Anderson as I did some general “Huh I wonder what she’s been up to” research:

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So she’s basically dickwhipped by the Wikileaks guy now? What a wild fucking life she’s lived, from being naked to getting famous by wearing slightly more clothes and bouncing around on a beach to incessantly calling Tommy Lee babe while getting her insides scooped out by his baby arm to bringing vegan fucking cheeseburgers to a government leaker hiding in Ecuador. Pamela Anderson, what can’t you do (maybe besides age with grace and dignity)?