The Game Of Thrones Premiere Causing PornHub Traffic To Nosedive Is The Least Surprising Thing Ever
I feel like these Pornhub traffic charts come out after every holiday and weather catastrophe and nothing ever shocks us. Of course people are looking up ginger porn after St. Patrick’s Day and are hammering their broadband with smut during a blizzard. That’s just how the human brain works. And seeing that people don’t watch porn during Game of Thrones is really no different than the Super Bowl. Between the game, the commercials, and the halftime show, you literally don’t have a minute on Super Sunday to rub one out. Same for that hour of uncut fantastic TV to the gut. Lights off, no more phone, that’s the way I like the Throne. It’s the one hour per week that I am disconnected from the outside world and focusing on the matter at hand. That’s not always the case when I’m doing anything else. Whether it’s driving or watching my kid. But when Thrones is on, there is nooooo way I’m going on my phone or my computer. And it appears a shitload of people do the same. Plus based on the bump right after the show is over, people are ready to crack stick as soon as the show is over. It doesn’t matter if Melisandre is getting banged out on the chessboard or Tyrion is swimming in whores. That itch is going to want to be scratched as soon as the credits are over. You can always catch the Next On on YouTube or some shit.
In fact, I had to guess, the amount that traffic surge right after Thrones ends rises probably varies by whether or not there was an N for Nudity before the episode started. I bet the episodes with the highest percentage of drop off occurred when there was an N.
*Please do not research this because I just blindly made an assumption and I’m not in the mood to be Well Actually’d today. Sometimes you just have to fire off a hot take without fear of retaliation.
And if you want to watch the absolute opposite of porn, check out Charlie, Trent, and I talk about the Season 7 premiere.